WE’RE GETTING RIGHT INTO WEEK 18 PICKS AND WE’RE STARTING WITH THE ONLY GAME THAT TRULY MATTERS.
Last Week: 4-1, Season: 51-34-1, Lifetime: 106-62-4
Vikings (+2.5) @ Lions — WOOOO!!! It’s Week Eighteen and for the second time in four years, the Lions feature in the final game of the regular season! Last time we had this go-around, Kerby Joseph (now forever known in Detroit as “Ridiculous Pro Bowl snub” Kerby Joseph) ended Aaron Rodgers’s Packers career and knocked those sons of guns out of the ‘loffs.
(Special side note to readers: you may have noticed these past two seasons that I have a strong proclivity for ostensibly stupid abbreviations of random words. I just called the playoffs the ‘loffs. I think that’s just part of the package at this point. If you hate it, keep reading anyway though. Call it “hate reading” if you have to save face. I don’t care.)
This time around, we won’t have the pleasure of ending our foes’s season in Game 272, a fun designation for the last game of the season, and a thing we used to call Game 256. This time around we’ve got Minnesota coming into town, and even though both teams have secured ‘loff berths, the stakes are much higher. It cannot be overstated the degree to which the Lions need a spot of rest. The Week Five bye is starting to rear it’s head and you’re starting to see the wear & tear that 13 straight weeks of pro football can go do. That’s partially why that always-inexplicable Week Two loss at home to Tampa Bay bothered me so freaking much: if we didn’t totally flush the proverbial mouse in that game, we’re not only resting our starters on the bye week, we’d be resting them this week as well.
Alas, there’s no use looking back. We’re here now. One game for, perhaps not all the marbles, but quite a few substantial marbles. The 1-seed. Meaning home games through to the Supe and a bye. Not having to hit the road against LA, Tampa, potentially Philly or Minnesota again. Retaining Kings In The North title. It’s all up for grabs and the general consensus of the national punditry is that the Lions have spent all their house money. The injury straws will break the camel’s back. More metaphors. They’re saying the Lions are cooked, in a nutshell. I’m not so sure. The Lions really showed a lot of moxie last week out in California. Saint Frankie’s season was essentially over. All they had left was spoiler. It was a solid and frothy crowd. The Lions didn’t play excellently the whole game, but they never quit playing as hard as they could and eventually they found themselves in position to take advantage of a few fortunate bounces. That was the 6-point margin. Covered the spread on the road against a talented team.
I alluded to it in last week’s post: Campbell has these guys relishing challenges to the nth degree. Truly embracing many different encounters with adversity as opportunities for greatness. The positivity that is inherent in that attitude is something to be admired in any walk of life, and particularly fun to see in pro football. People think because it’s a violent sport, football’s best fuel is meanness and vitriol toward your opponent, but the opposite is true: football teams play best when everyone playing is inspired by love for their team and teammates. Despite these boatloads of unwelcome roster turnover, there’s still a cohesion and love that runs deep in this team. There are gonna be guys playing significant minutes on Sunday that weren’t really on our radar in late August. But they’re Lions now. They’re in the fold, they’re part of the family. And when they’re on the field with 10 other guys they can play to their fullest potential knowing that the team behind them is fully focused and complementarily supportive.
The facts have been well-documented but I feel compelled to restate the fact for the record: these Lions have had the worst luck of any team this season, injury-wise. It’s not really that close. These hit the ears and they sound like excuses but I think something else is afoot: I think Dan Campbell is using these seemingly insurmountable circumstances to keep the metaphorical fire stoked. “Hey offense, thanks for the 40 spot out in Santa Clara, but is that the absolute toughest you can be? If we’re being honest, aren’t you a 50-point offense? Y’know… if you’re playing up to your potential?”
It’s gonna be tough. We’re a little more banged-up than we were in our first encounter. They’re a little healthier. They’re feeling themselves a little. They’ve got some serious weapons on offense, particularly in the air, where we looked more than a little vulnerable last week. There are a lot of reasons to think the Vikings are gonna win this game. But if you look at this matchup through the prism of this entire season’s gestalt, there are plenty of reasons to like the Lions in this game too. I’m going with the home team. Ride or die. The Lions are still the Kings in The North.
...And The Rest!
Panthers (+7.5) @ Falcons — Unclean Birds.
Dolphins (+1.5) @ Jets — Gotta get something from the Jets this season.
Washington (-6.5) @ Dallas — Like the Commanders to play for seeding.
Bears (+9.5) @ Packers — Could be best game of the week. Points me! Bears me!
Those last two picks assume Washington and Green Bay are perceiving a big diff between seeds 6 & 7, which I think there definitely is. I think they’ll both play big today to avoid a road trip to Philly and instead book a flight to LA or Tampa/’Lanta. And since this relies on these assumptions anyway we’re gonna buck conventional wisdom and say that Chicago keeps it close, maybe even pulls off the upset W, while Washington takes care of the Cowboys, whose negativity is stronger than the “one last ride for pride on the road”-feeling Bears. Let’s see how it shakes out. As always, thanks so much for reading. I hope you’ve had a fun regular season. If you bet with us faithfully, you made yourself a little bit of dough! Well done! If you’ve made it two years straight you’re just stupid rich by now. Send us some cash please. Just kidding. Seriously though, we love our readers. And we love our Lions. Positive vibes only as we careen towards destiny on Sunday Night. Peace and love this New Year! Auf Wiedersehen!
